Virgoan17's Xanga

The only thing that's permanent is change.

Thu, 01 Oct 2009 12:24:16 GMT

Been sometime since I wrote here (I realize this is becoming quite the trend for my xanga as of late...and by that i mean it in months...but I know one person who'll be happy I updated coughviccough) and I thought maybe my xanga needed a little sprucing up.

Cheers to the title of this post because it's just so darn true at the this point of time. Change has been the epitome of my life (well to everyone's lives too Emiko, duh, but I just feel mine's had a lot more physical change too). Moving from Japan to Australia to Burma and then to Singapore definitely are a part of the huge changes, moving schools within the same country have been big changes too, and even having dual citizenship was a change for sometime. So you'd think that having shifted about a lot would have me be used to all that goes around me with people leaving and new ones coming by but no. Not really. More like I cling on for dear life to all things familiar and i REFUSE to assimilate with the change. Dammit.

All this is coming about because the people I've called good friends who are more like family to me are leaving one by one (or left) and it's like Here we go again. Graduation all over. PEOPLE SHOULD ONLY HAVE TO GRADUATE ONCE. Yeah fine. I'm ranting. I'm being whiney. I suppose these people just mean a lot to me. But they'll be back in no time and before I know it we're all gonna be celebrating to bring in the new year again...right? Since time changes too.

So onto time going by like nobody's business, my anniversaire (french for birthday folks) has come and gone and I spent it with the people who matter most to me, though with a few exceptions cuz not all my good friends could be there. Here are some of the photos from my 21st that was spent in Bintan =)

lol..with people who were missed at the beach.

On my actual birthday was the coronation night for Miss Earth Singapore, which was held at Bellini Grande.

with Sya as always :)

Sya, Jo (our choreographer in our year and supermodel!), Jessie, Jessica

Jessie was Miss Earth Singapore Fire 2006

The two Miss Earth Airs - Jessica passed her crown onto me in 2007

and I'd have more photos but xanga's come up with this new format of having to upload photos you wanna post in your weblogs into your xanga albums (which is so time consuming) so I'll end it off here with the next photo which was when we sent Justin off.

TWENTY ONE...brings me closer to finding my feet and emancipation. HAHA. I kid. But yeah, after this school year I'm going to graduate (buh bye NUS!!!) and I'm really lucky to know what I wanna do immediately afterwards. That of course is after a well-deserved grad trip =D

And before I sign off,

YIMING OH I MISS YOU! A LOT =(

Emiko over and out.

It's that time of year again

Wed, 05 Aug 2009 04:50:40 GMT

Kinda funny how my calendar goes by the school year. So as the title suggests, it's that time where plans are made, goals are set, I'm thinking of what I want to achieve in this school year (not just academic goals mind), etc etc.

This is actually gonna be a pretty short post. More like, yes people I'm alive =) and I know YOU my dearest Victoria, read and keep reminding me I haven't updated this place since forever (more like my last post which was post-MSU) so that's what this is for. Ha ha ha.

So I'm not gonna divulge any of my plans yet BUT they have been set in motion and I'm gonna see to it that it all materializes in due time. I had a lot of time to think in the one month I spent in Australia. And a lot of fun. Pictures up soon!

I'm one happy bird =) Emiko over and out!

All night show with just you in the crowd

Wed, 20 May 2009 14:07:59 GMT

It takes me more than a week after the MSU finals to actually write a post about it and post pictures of events that happened after too.

Lately I've just wanted to have some space and time to myself instead of answering to the beck and call of people on my phone, over msn, or whatever means of communication. Luckily for me, I'll be flying to australia in a few days where I'll get that much needed quiet.

The lead up to the MSU finals was rather frustrating and more or less overshadowed all the fun I had during the pageant for me. From all the silly predictions on missosology to the rumors and all the phone calls from the new paper that were made, it just took the fun out of a pageant. Yes you have a group of girls, yes there's only one crown, but it doesn't mean you have to end up enemies or hating one another or coming out feeling sour about everything. It affected all the girls, and I suppose by the finals we were just trying to have fun and make the moments last though the damage had been done. In any case, I had my share of fun with Syasya my love :) as well as newfound friends like Jeanine, Ethel, April and all. You girls made it enjoyable and I wanna thank you for being the amazing people you are :)

Dave, one of the official photographer's has processed his photos so here's the link to his flickr site http://www.flickr.com/photos/davios/sets/72157614997959483/

and here are the ones I took in the minimal time we had backstage as well as during the last rehearsal :)

SAMMY : I had one like this with you and now it's Sya's turn!! lol and in case you need a reminder the picture i'm talking about is the following one!

in all queenly grace =P

back to MSU photos...

this is called letting loose when all the stress gets to you

With Patricia our amazing trainer :)

the top 5 were Cheryl, Rachel, April, Jeanine , and I. I think it would've been more exciting if they had called the numbers randomly instead of numerical order. I also got the question I was dreading the most and didn't have an answer to, which was What's the biggest lie you've ever told and why? I did start off with a "wellllllll I can't say I've lied before so...." but nobody laughed! =( My sad attempt at a joke. Anyway I ended up talking about this third grade math test I took. On hindsight, the better answer would've been to have said that MSU meant nothing to me and how I don't want to represent Singapore at miss universe because THAT would've been a rather big lie. Oh yeah, and someone took our bouquets from our chairs after we changed out of our evening gowns.

In any case, CONGRATULATIONS RACHEL (though this is very belated lol)!! Do us proud in Nassau!!

So after the pageant, I headed to zouk to meet the boys and jeanie and tabs and co for keegen's birthday cum post party kinda thing =) Photo credits to louisa and me

boys doing some weird cheer thing they do in the army O_o

who looks more innocent? =P

a lot of forced drinking and 5 seconds of vodka that night.

the girls

YEAH close friendships from pageants/contests DO last...like the one I have with oh so wonderful Tabs =)

Week after was spent sleeping and meeting up with people before everybody leaves for summer.
KINKS day out =)

I got my shot with jeanie's sexy umbrella too! =P

Presenting to you: JIGGLE JO

JOYKO "MOMO" HOTTBUTTCHEEKOS

BOBO THULSKINKME

and yours truly KOKOKINS

Next up are photos from Butter with the MSU girls when we decided to take Ethel out on her first clubbing experience since she turned 18 not long ago =)

I had fun dancing that night and we had to persuade Rachel to come out on the dance floor...lol.

And to wrap up this post, here're pictures from a meet up with Tabs, Sophie, and Cassandra with whom I did the new paper new face in 2005 =) We had an interesting conversation over soup and later at star bucks too hahaha

she who stole my shawl but whom I love anyway

Sophie only you can carry off bangs above your eyebrows without looking dorky ha. And i'm gonna be getting bangs real soon too!

our jumpshot didn't work out as well

And at the end of the night she STILL has my shawl on.

I have so much to do and so little time before I fly off. This has been a long post so I"ll save my thoughts for another one sometime soon. Oh and yeah to end it off with something funny, last night I was in an msn conversation with some of the artillery boys planning what to do today because they were free. And we took so long deciding what to do or when to meet and Gabe said "For officers we're not so good at planning for a day out, how do u expect me to plan for war?"

Hahahaha. Sometimes I just wanna bring a camcorder along when I hang out with them. (nor do I know why my font has turned this way or how to fix it as much as i've tried to).

Waiting for Saturday

Tue, 05 May 2009 15:28:28 GMT

So four tests are down and there's only public admin in asia left on Thursday. It's crazy having to juggle finals and MSU at the same time but I realized I'm the type of person who lives on this kind of adrenaline (which involves freaking out and running, literally, all the way to kent ridge hall from the faculty of arts just to make it to my voice exam on time. And I was late because Tabs and I woke up later than planned, and yes I slept over at Tabs' place cuz she lives nearer school than I do and 8am exams are just killer to wake up for. But of course you know what happens when you have two girls sleep over =P more talking and less sleeping)

Came back home, met ming for lunch for a bit and then headed back home to crash. If you count the amount of sleep I've had over the past two days it comes up to a total of SIX HOURS. So much for gaining weight.

Last night the MSU girls had our speech training and also tried on the new bikinis for the swimsuit segment along with the singapore shawl that each of us would be walking with. Shelly's shawls are amazing and INCREDIBLY BEAUTIFUL! I'm so happy with the shawl I got because it's so colorful and I was practicing with it before the others had arrived and it was just so pretty :) I'll let the pictures do the talking.

with Gina

Jeanine and Rachel

full body with our shawls - I felt somewhat short yesterday because I didn't wear heels to practice (whatwith all the tests in school and stuff I just didn't have time to stuff in extra heels into my already bulging backpack)

Cheryl, whom I've never seen around campus and so we've decided to try and meet up for lunch SOMETIME next semester in school :)

Hui Ting

Rachel, who's also an ex new face girl. Haha Angelia if you're reading this we'll do you proud!

The one who calls me Otaku. She is my spongebob. Ha ha :)

Shee Yan, Gina, and Jacelyn

And then dinner arrived =D (sya I hardly took pictures with you yesterday!! =( )

With ever so sweet Ethel =) Indeed you'll be a history maker chica! You're an amazing person =)

I just can't wait for Thursday's test to be over! Emiko over and out!

Dodos and Global Warming

Sat, 02 May 2009 17:41:22 GMT

YIMING IS BACK!

I just had to note something really funny down because while I was about town today with Alvin I think we were talking about global warming or something...no wait, yeah we were talking about how he tried to kill a small spider that was crawling near my tray. Grateful for getting ridof the spider no doubt, but I told him every organism is important and contributes to our ecosystem. Then he asks why then hasn't the exitnction of dodos affected us severely and I said "just you wait, one day you'll see how the extinction of dodos has contributed one way or another to global warming". Yeah that's emiko with zero sleep and constant studying for exams for you right there.

Disclaimer: I'm usually not this silly. I'm just very sleep deprived.

Oh yeah on another note, ~~you're getting on my nerves~~. Nevermind. I have better things to do than sit here and be a hater.

SIX days and counting to MSU finals!

I know this is kinda late but there's the MSU CHARITY CAR WASH happening later today at 10am until noon at the SAFRA club at Mt Faber. So if you've got the time, please head down as the girls will be washing cars with proceeds going to Club Rainbow. Club Rainbow is a charity supporting children who are terminally ill. They're also involved in a lot of family-support activities and movements and you'll definitely be contributing to a great cause by getting your car washed. I strongly believe that childhood is something that ought not to be violated and every child deserves a chance at a good life, so please if you've got time, go down and support this event. Your donation and time will be greatly appreciated =)

I regret that I won't get to be at the car wash because I have an exam on monday morning and I haven't even touched my notes for that particular class yet. =(

It's always important to give back to society just as it is important to return your trays after eating at fast food chains. Besides, children are our leaders of tomorrow and it's important to give them their due respect and to give them means to explore who they are so that they can contribute to the world too.

I need to get cracking on Singapore's Foreign Policy. and fast. Test is on monday and I'm nowhere near prepared. Then tuesday is Voice studies, and wrapping up the exams for this academic year will be public admin in asia on thursday evening. --- BRING ON THE NERD----

Emiko over and out =)

Have a great week ahead everybody!

One Bean To Rule Them All

Fri, 01 May 2009 09:11:19 GMT

So it's two tests down and three left for me. It just feels like thursday won't come soon enough, and after that on Saturday night is of course an even bigger thing aka the finals for miss singapore universe. Muchos exciting!! More so because I've been waiting for this since I turned 18.

On another note, welcome to my blog, readers from gossipgalore! (this is so random, I know. But I've been getting a lot of visits from this site)

Emiko's brain is in the process of burning out because she's already done two tests, and has the hardest two ever coming up, namely Singapore's Foreign Policy, and her most dreaded class, Public Policy in Asia. *shudder*

Last night was enjoyable after the test because a couple of my classmates from one of my theater classes and I went for dinner. Then we went to Ben & Jerry's to get ice cream and talk on the outside deck of vivo.

As for the title of this post, it's referring to mine and Debs' theory of Ben & Jerry's "guess the number of beans in the bag" contest! She took out a couple of beans from the sack just to play with them and then I asked "wonder if that'll affect the answers of those who guessed BEFORE you stole a couple of beans Debs". Ho hum. The things we do to keep ourselves amused.

And the things I do to.... yeah, well, forget it.

I think Yiming gets back in about 7 hours from Taiwan with his cadets. Thank you for making my day on Friday (i think??) and calling! :)

E I G H T DAYS AND COUNTING TO THE BIG NIGHT!

So you sailed away, into a grey sky morning

Thu, 23 Apr 2009 05:42:39 GMT

My xanga really needed a facelift so that's what it got. And the new picture is none other than amazing Eboni Stocks, who was the winner of Australia's Next Top Model in cycle 5. She's really kickass and she doesn't hesitate to rough it out or get dirty. That's what I like about her.

I really need to figure out how to get non-xanga links to show on modules so I can link up other blogs. And I need to get rid of many of my current subscriptions too.

Sometimes I think people really need to use common sense. If you aren't sure about something, then ask. No one's gonna shoot you for asking a question. Assumptions get you nowhere but it's human nature to take that route because it's easier. I know I'm guilty of it as much as I try not to assume.

It's funny how exams are a week away but I'm not feeling the stress. Possibly because my heavier finals are spaced out nicely and the theater ones are like buffers. That's not to say the theater ones aren't hard but they're very straightforward. (And I should be studying now so I'll be back with an update later.)

I'll leave this with PHOTOS that'll speak for themselves..a bit from the last week of school up until this week's theater assessments.

(voice gang doing a Nat...see juni doing Jai Ho! at the back!)

(doing a Kai)

(lol with sir ren aka serene)

don't we all love marcus! (we're all in costume for our roles btw hence Debs' trench coat)

girls from acting for the screen sans Su cuz it was her and Ben's turn in front of the camera

with Su - i have no comment for this photo hahahaha.

the kill bill girls....

Introduction to international relations here I come.

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sometimes, actually almost everyday, I wish we still had an open line of communication - but whoever said you could get complete closure.

Christabel & Lily - and the road not taken

Fri, 17 Apr 2009 17:19:04 GMT

First up, I need to start my post with a huge and sincere thank you to Christabel and Lily, two of my classmates from ballet for being there for me when I fainted in class. It happened out of the blue when we were learning how to position our arms when images of the room just started flashing and i started seeing spots until everything blacked out on me. Thank you Christabel for buying me milo so I'd have some form of sugar/energy in me and thank you Lily for driving me home :) I really owe you girls.

Also, I need to thank Shn for lending her shoes to busy me for my evening gown segment of MSU. I'm so busy with finals looming in a week and my last exam being just two days before the MSU finals (which is on the 9th of May, tickets are selling now so please ask if you're interested). She saved me the trouble and time of having to find shoes of my own. so a big shoutout to you Shn!! :)

On another note, voice recitals are done and that means 50% of our grades are accounted for woe is me! I can safely say that I'm more confident parading in a bikini in front of people I don't know rather than do a recital but YAY that's over and done with :) Oh yeah my poem was The Road Not Taken by Robert Frost. I chose it because I felt it really embodied my personality. I like defying stereotypes and breaking convention. That's not to say that I don't comply to convention of course.

The last theater assessment is this coming tuesday, and I've got the longest film script (FIVE PAGES) compared to the others' and I'm partnering Marcus. Pretty interesting script, Mr. Campbell said he chose the roles for us for specific reasons, and mine is that of a woman who's walked out on her child and husband. Lots of emotions to convey to the camera so that's gonna be fun, but how I relate to the character, I have no idea.

YIMING OH I MISS YOU!!! COME HOME SOON!!!

The last week of school flew by like nobody's business, and summer is around the corner. My plans are so tentative and mainly depend on what happens on may 9th. *fingers crossed...toes too*

I need to sleep more. And gain weight.

Of hot pants, sacrifices, and red lights

Thu, 09 Apr 2009 16:56:40 GMT

Kaleidoscope kaleidoscope kaleidoscope....

Thursdays would usually mean I'm not in school, but there was a tutorial to make up for today at 10am and as of late I've been oversleeping lots. Which necessitated taking a cab to school because I left my house just five minutes before 10. So I got a cab and after I told the driver, who looked about his thirties, he asked me what time my class was. So I said ten. He then proceeded to tell me that it was already ten and I was like yeah that's why I'm taking a cab instead of the usual bus-train-bus into campus. Then the conversation goes as such:

Driver: "So you going for class or to study?"
Me: "For class..why?"
Driver: " You can go to class like that?"
Me: *confused*
Driver: "They let you in class wearing hot pants and all..?"
Me: "They're shorts, not hot pants. And yeah there's no dress code"
Driver: "They don't do anything at all? But they should!"
Me: "I think at this age we're trusted to make the right choices for ourselves and dress ourselves.." *beginning to get annoyed*
Driver: "Wah but ngee ann got dress code and you cannot wear certain things...surely nus must do the same thing.."
Me: "Yeah well they let us express ourselves" *turns up ipod volume*

Honestly, I got so annoyed at him. For one, I was NOT wearing hot pants. And i was sitting in the back. Mister nosy eyes just got on my nerves so bad and I think he ought to learn social etiquette 101 where you're taught NOT to insult the first person that climbs into your cab. It was just waaaaaaaaay too much to handle especially after waking up late for class. Grrr.

On another note when I got to school, the class was discussing how Singapore might be too small to be able to exercise soft power (coercion/attraction in foreign policy/diplomatic terms) and one of the guys in my group said something along the lines of how Singapore definitely exercises its soft power and is being recognized on the global arena because its got one of the best education systems in the world that even countries like America are using our textbooks. The latter i'll give him. But one of the best education systems in the world? I get that the facilities and equipment is a lot better, and no this isn't meant to be offensive to the policy makers of our gov't, but honestly, that statement is really questionable. This I'm saying from my two years of junior college and also from having relief taught at Nanyang Primary School for ten months. I'm not sure producing templates that are very much burnt out is "one of the best education systems"-deem-worthy.

In every new semester of school I meet people who are just here to get a degree but not entirely sure what they'd rather be doing. They're just majoring in whatever it is they are because of X number of reasons but not because they're passionate about it or cuz they love it. And that's just it. There's so much passion and spirit lacking that everyone feels drained. Even I feel it. We need teachers who are teaching because they love children and they want to make an impact on the kids' lives. We need children who desire to learn and explore, and that can only come from creating an environment that'll enable them to do so. Being spoonfed all the "right" answers for questions that have been "spotted" three months before the A levels does NOT count as quality education. Being told the answers just creates lazy people. People who can't research for themselves, nor write a proper bibliography and please note that I'm not writing all this out of thin air. I've worked with people in school, third years and fourth years and people in special programs like the university scholars' program who do not know how to compile a bibliography for their essays not to mention find the guideline on how to do so. Honestly, that's just really sad. And very reflective of what these people have gone through. Apathy really is no excuse.

The education ministry is definitely making changes and increasing both the quality and quantity of their teacher-recruits. Hopefully, we'll see a future generation of Singaporeans who know that education lies beyond just what your teacher tells you is right or wrong in the classroom. Education is everything around us. And passion is what propels us in life. Like I always say, you can either choose to exist, or live.

On another note, went to meet Tabs to study at the national library and we stopped at Bugis for an ice cream. While doing so, this lady approached us asking if we could do a short survey for her and before even waiting for my response (since she was talking to me) she just shoves the survey at my face. 1) VERY RUDE. 2)She wasn't really decently dressed for a survey lady. VERY low cut frilly leopard print tight LBD sort. *shudders*

Her short survey was almost TWENTY pages long. And what made me more mad was that she didn't even want to hear my answers. She asks me what are my main concerns about my skin etc and then she goes on to happily tick "whitening" and then "acne" or something that's REALLY irrelevant to me. For starters, I don't like whitening AT ALL. And it was just so annoying that she wants me to do the survey but she wants me to put down answers she wanted. And then while I fill up a more tedious part of the survey myself she asks Tabs if she could do one too to which we both said sorry we've got to get going. (which really was the case, other than her being honestly annoying). But then she sort of ran off then came back with another huge stack of papers which was actually just another survey and thrusted it at Tabs. To which both of us reacted lividly. Hello, we just said no thank you. So stop pushing your luck and stop being so rude and pushy. (Yeah by now all of you will think I'm an angsty person but today was just a day when I got rubbed wrong by more than one person). She just started off all wrong you know? First she doesn't approach us politely and then shoves things in our face and then does whatever she likes....gah.

edit//

I had a funny moment the other day when I decided to make dinner for the family. That whole day I listened to melee's built to last. Considering whom i relate to that song, I should be doing everything but listening to it. But it was just so soothing. I don't know. Is my mind desensitizing myself to all the pain and turning it into good things? Of course I have a bone to pick with my subconscious because my dreams for the past few weeks have been very questionable. Instead of forcing myself, I'm just going with the flow. And most of the times, I miss you a lot. But before it gets any worse, I stop myself. Summer feels daunting sometimes, because after next week's last week of school, who knows when I'll see you again. It's incredible how big an impact you had on me.

cause you are the sun in my universe
consider the best when we felt the worst
cause this is real, and this is good
it warms the inside just like it should
but most of all
most of all, it's built to last
it's built to last

Brings me to the red light part of my entry. I love this new song. I love these lines in the lyrics :

When there`s something that makes you want it
There`s no way you can just say no
But you can`t put your finger on it

So on another note, Mika's song Happy Ending seems to be coming up a lot lately. And I actually have a problem with the lyrics (yeah what does Emiko NOT have a problem with hahaha). The part that I don't quite get is

Wake up in the morning
Stumble on my life
Can't get no love
Without sacrifice

I think Mika needs to wake up on the right side of his bed to know that love and sacrifice are a package deal. There AINT no love if there isn't sacrifice. That's what loving is all about isn't it? Taking a shot for your family and loved ones, staying out a little later than you can for your closest friends, etc. You get my point. I don't get how love can work without sacrifice. Maybe that exists in a Utopian society but Gaia isn't Utopian. Though that's what makes earth and reality a utopia. We can't appreciate the good things unless we have the bad to highlight them. And so begins my list of things to be thankful about today (i got this idea from Sammy) :

-to Charmaine for pushing me to come to our last tutorial today
-to Jeanie for that ten which got me through today (must remind my mom haha)
-to Tabs for being the amazing person she is and studying with me at the nlb :)
-to my new friends at ballet for helping translate when the teacher instructed in chinese
-and to my ballet instructor for trying his very best to instruct in english for my sake and for praising my backward split and inspiring me to be able to do a normal sideways split
-to my mom because I was just thinking about how I wouldn't be where I am or have achieved what I have because without her, ISY wouldn't have happened.

I have lots more to be thankful for but I'm going to stop here for now because this is becoming a long post. I'll end off with pictures from the meetup with Sammy and Sya and pictures April and I took after our MSU photoshoot. as well as other MSU photos (courtesy of Sya hehehe).

I LOVE THESE TWO :)

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I love this girl too :)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY APRIL!!!!!<3

Les Devoirs

Sun, 05 Apr 2009 13:33:56 GMT

This is called procrastinating.

0/4000.

On another note, I need to get a new charger for my phone because the one I have now is being all cranky and doesn't connect very well when I insert it into my phone.

I also need to change my xanga layout soon. (after this darned public administration essay is done). The slight problem with doing an essay on Malaysia's public admin is that most of the good/useful books in the library are all in Malay. My sources are limited.

Dinner at ming's was fun and even more so because the boys did most of the kitchen work =P too bad nobody took out their cameras. You'd be amazed at how domesticated ming is hahaha (at which point he goes "Hey I'm not married!!"...*blank stares*). But yeah the food was great and the company was even better.

Phuture later saw a total count of Gabe, Justin, Ming, and me. But that was fun too.

Lately I've been feeling as though it's best if people stay away from me because everything feels like a blank. It's like time stopped and I'm just waiting to feel alive again. SNAP OUT OF IT EMIKO. It's a time like now that I cannot afford to slip up and let whatever overshadow my person.

We've had our official photoshoot and gym/facial session for miss singapore universe. I'll upload the photos and update this post once I get them =)

More later. 4000 words on Bumiputras and the civil service here I come.